I've had a very bad case of the insecurities lately. I keep reading about self-publishing and how it's all crap and slowly that mentality started to freak me out. What if I'm writing crap? what if everyone hates my book? What if no one buys it?
Then I began reading On Writing by Stephen King. Phew! All of this is totally normal. And I don't suck. I didn't really get these fears with my non-fiction writing because I started that with 0 expectations. I wrote, it sold. Each random transaction was regular confirmation that I AM a writer and one that makes money doing so.
Writing fiction is a completely different beast. I don't get regular confirmation that my writing is good. I think it's good. I enjoy reading it, even over and over again. I have the first 9 chapters written, and most of the end of the story. I just need to fill in the gaps, about 12 more chapters worth. I have 15 days to do it. I made a pot of coffee for tonight, and will try to get as much as I can done.
I can see the finish line. It's taunting me. Today in church, one bible passage stuck out to me from my New Living Translation: Galatians 6:4 Pay careful attention to your own work, for then you will get the satisfaction of a job well-done, and you won't need to compare yourself to anyone else. Even if you aren't of the Christian faith, it's sage advice. I need to worry about my own project and seeing it through to the end. Who cares if my book isn't as good as other chick-lit/romance writers? They aren't me. And maybe my different style and voice in writing will catch an audience who loves a good love story, but nothing too sappy.
Grooveshark on. Writer open. Time to get busy.
"Disengaged" arriving Late Summer 2011. A robotics engineer asks his business partner to marry him, but a previous one-night stand is having his baby.
That sounds so familiar, and I'm not self-publishing! I still wonder if what I've written is good enough, and doubt that it is.
ReplyDeleteThe verse is excellent.
I tell myself: There are books better than this book. There are also books worse than this book. I am making this book the best book 'I' can make it.
We can't really ask more of ourselves.
Thanks Kim!!! I just revamped Chapter 9. I was stuck when I wrote the beginning and just put down some boring narrative of x,y,z happened. Tonight I went back and fleshed it out with dialogue and blocking (I play my scenes in my head).
ReplyDeleteI highly recommend Stephen King's book if you haven't read it yet. I'm adamant that I'm going to finish this draft by May 31st. No matter what. I won't let MYSELF down.
Elizabeth,
ReplyDeleteI've been reading your blog for a while, rooting for you to achieve your dreams. Just write, honey, and don't worry about what comes next. You're not in control of that part.
When I first started thinking about self publishing, you can't imagine the scorn heaped upon self-publishers by the gatekeepers in NYC. Well, boy-howdy, how things have changed. Just take a look a Penguin's Book Country, for example. Like I said, don't worry.
I'm podcasting my novel, then I'm going to publish it as an e-book. Thanks for the tip about pricing. I'll keep it in mind.
I hate it when people comment on my blog for just a chance to have me link to theirs, so I don't want to do that to you. However if you'd like to have a look at a person who has been following you, go to www.allaboutjanesranch.com. The title of my novel is Palace of the Blue Butterfly. Feel free to erase this off my comment. I just don't know how else for you to see that a person al the way out in California is hoping you reach your goals. All the best--Jane
Jane, thanks for reading! I was wondering where all of those California traffic sources were from... I'm happy to share a link with you as you are in a closely related genre. We might be able to share readers in the future! I placed your link on my blog very proudly. I have no problems networking with people who are just like me: professional, *mostly* polite, and working on writing fun stories for women. I confess I do not have much of a chance to check out your book at the moment, not until June. I'm diligently working to finish my first draft by May 31st, and then I will take a few weeks off and can check out "Palace of the Blue Butterfly." Thank you so much for your encouraging words, they were a godsend, trust me!
ReplyDelete